I’m sure you’ve been there. Your favorite radio station just keeps playing that same song, over and over, again and again, and always when you least want to hear it. It doesn’t really matter what type of music you like–rock, pop, country, whatever– there are just some songs that should be loaded into a rocket and launched into outer space, never to pollute earth’s “sound sphere” again. It gets even worse when some of these songs transcend radio and wind up in advertisements, as jingles, elevator music, etc., etc.
For the purposes of this list, I’ve focused on popular songs by popular entertainers that you’re probably very familiar with. Most of these are older; it takes time for a song to really ingrain itself into your psyche.
These are just my ten. I’m sure you have some candidates of your own?
Here Comes The Sun by the Beatles. Yes, the Beatles. I’ve always hated this song ever since my 9th grade English teacher got the bright idea of playing it for us in class and forcing us to PICK OUT THE VERBS! Yes, pick out the verbs in your favorite Beatles song! Try it and see if it doesn’t ruin the song for you forever. Enough said.
You’re So Vain by Carly Simon. I cringe every time I hear this song. It’s been played about fifteen bazillion times and isn’t it time we hear something else? (Anything else, please!!)
Feelings by many different artists. On the old Carol Burnett Show, there was a segment once in which Carol’s “Eunice” character sang “Feelings” in a talent contest. It was comic brilliance. Not only is this song horrific, but so was Eunice’s rendition. I’ve heard many versions done by many different artists and they’re all horrendous. Please, stop the insanity! No more “Feelings!”
C’mon Get Happy – The Partridge Family Theme Song. There’s something about the saccharin “C’mon get happy” and “whole lotta lovin” lyrics that just rub me the wrong way. As a kid, I was a Brady Bunch man. Give me “Time To Change” over “C’mon Get Happy” any day.
In The Ghetto By Elvis Presley. I don’t hate Elvis, but this song is so dripping in overwrought sentimentality that it deserves to banned from the Elvis playlist for all time. There’s better Elvis to listen to. MUCH better.
Light My Fire by The Doors. How this ever became a “classic” is beyond me. The lyrics are stupid and the tempo is like something you’d hear at a funeral. To me, nothing screams “bad music” like “Light My Fire.” Somebody please light fire to all the sheet music of this song so we’ll never have to hear it again!
Party All The Time. Eddie Murphy? You’re kidding, right?
Hotel California by The Eagles. This song has been played to death and now I wish I could check out of listening to it forever. I know, I know. It’s considered a “classic.” But something about it makes me feel like I’ve just spent the night in a bad Motel 6.
Born In The USA by Bruce Springsteen. Many people think this is a patriotic song, but it’s not. (Check the lyrics closely.) Sure, Springsteen sings it with gusto but there’s better Springsteen to listen to. It may be his anthem, but it’s not mine.
Bridge Over Troubled Water by Simon and Garfunkel. I actually like much of Simon and Garfunkel’s tunes, but I can’t take any more “Bridge.” Worst of all is the instrumental “Muzak” versions that play in the elevator when you’re on your way to the dentist. I’d rather have my teeth pulled than listen to “Bridge Over Troubled Water” again.
Additional nominations anyone?