People I meet these days are generally nice when I’m out shopping, however there is always that element of rudeness by sales assistants who convey the feeling that you’re intruding on their personal time. It is not uncommon that I enter a store to see a young sale’s assistant on the cellphone texting like there is no tomorrow, and oblivious to everything going on around them. It is apparent that these people work for a living since they most likely don’t possess the skills or self discipline it takes to run a business of their own without going broke in less than 3 months. Furthermore, there are also those who not only give you this impression, but also speak to you in a manner most won’t tolerate.
In the workplace, intimidation is standard practice among some in an attempt to gain recognition and promotion. Some can cope easily working with this type of person, while others find it so uncomfortable it makes them physically sick at the thought of having to go to work. This person usually explodes in a final confrontation which leads them to prompt termination. The office bully should not be tolerated. If you’re experiencing this in any form it should be immediately reported to your Human Resources department, or speak with your employer directly. Wrongful dismissal can result from such an argument and although we live in a litigious society, many are reluctant to pursue the matter having been so mentally run down from previous torment, that they shudder at the mere thought of further conflict.
I have a friend who says ‘yes’ to almost everything suggested to her in stores since she becomes so intimidated by pushy sales people, she buys things to keep them happy. Her husband however, is not so happy and it is most distressing to watch. Her credit card statement is a yard long list of panic purchases, and because she has let this fear of rudeness and being intimidated interfere with her life, her marriage and her health is also being affected.
Case in point; she recently went to the Doctor complaining of stomach cramps. I am no surgeon but persistent stomach cramps should be investigated further since it may be something quite sinister. She was told to go home and take Tylenol and “keep an eye on things”.
As far as I am concerned, a Doctor’s credentials are nothing if he does not do what he or she is trained for. Of course my friend did as was suggested, and two months later she still has the cramps and will not call the Doctor back for fear of insulting his intelligence. What intelligence?
Did I miss something?
Next week we are off to the city for a day at the Presidential Library and I plan to take her to see a different Doctor. Since we live in a small town, she doesn’t want word to get around she saw a new one. It sounds just like Mayberry doesn’t it?
If rudeness can assist people in staying sick, and doing things they don’t want to do, then they seriously need the help to learn how to say no. I had to make the same change myself years ago, and it isn’t easy. But it is an empowering feeling to be able to say no if that is what you mean, or disagree and not worry there will be conflict following for having your own opinion. It really can change your outlook and make you become a more self assured person.